TIS night:
now all the gushing fountains speak louder.
And my soul also is a gushing fountain.

‘Tis night:
now only all songs of the loving ones do awake.
And my soul also is the song of a loving one.
Something unappeased, unappeasable, is within me;
it longs to find expression….
Light am I: ah, that I were night!
But my lonesomeness is to be surrounded with light!
Ah, that I were dark and nightly!…

I know not the happiness of the receiver;
and oft have I dream’t that stealing
must be more blessed than receiving.

It is my poverty
that my hand never ceases bestowing;
it is my envy
that I see waiting eyes
and the brightened nights of longing.

Oh, the misery of all bestowers!
Oh, the darkening of my sun!
Oh, the craving to crave!
Oh, the violent hunger in satiety!

They take from me: but do I yet touch their soul?
There is a gap between giving and receiving;
and the smallest gap
has finally to be bridged over.

A hunger arises out of my beauty:
I should like to injure those I illumine;
I should like to rob those I have gifted:
— thus do I hunger for wickedness.

Thus Spake Zarathustra by Friedrich Nietzsche, trans. by Thomas Common, Part II, The Night Song, Page 103

Today is Memorial Day. I was present at the 130th annual ceremony at the Kaneville public meeting hall.  Kaneville is a farming community, a crossroads in southern Kane County with a population of around 500 people. A long time resident mentioned that the handful of last names on the photos of the high school graduating classes dating back to the 1920s are indicative of how “tight” the community remains to this day.

The occasion for honoring hometown veterans, especially the casualties of the wars dating back to the Civil War took the form of a Color Guard Presentation of the Colors, a Pledge of Allegiance, the Invocation by the local Methodist pastor, singing of the National Anthem, a salute to each of the branches of the Armed Forces as the veterans of each stood, musical selections performed by Fox Valley Festival Chorus, a presentation by the Kaneville Historical Society, retreat of the Colors and finally a procession to the cemetery. While at the graveyard each grave was decorated with flowers by local children, a salute was given by the Color Guard and Taps was played.

I had considerable time to think, to reflect upon what war has meant to my country in my lifetime. It seems to me that it is human to make a mistake, even a mistake with horrible, tragic consequences. I also think it unforgivable to make essentially the same mistake more than once, over and over, – as if helpless to restrain one’s urge. I mean that testosterone fueled inclination for payback with interest, when one believes oneself to be wronged. Or perhaps one’s country, or one’s political future seems precarious, due to foreign leaders choice of allies other than America…

I wondered how many of the wars, at a cost of billions of dollars and thousands of lives (on both sides) wouldn’t have made the least difference to American’s well being – IF they’d never been fought? The Korean War, Vietnam War, 1990 Gulf War, and the War in Afghanistan. There’s no answer to that. Counterfactual history is simply a mind game. It is certain many consumed in the maw of battle would be with us now…

I looked around the Kaneland meeting house. I felt kinship with my neighbors. I live in Kane County too. We homo sapiens, human mammals, have potential for greatness. And we have potential for mind numbing destruction, a terror from which victims will never recover.

And we prefer, myself included, to be told what to think, and when to obey.

This reflex we must learn to resist no matter the difficulty, if we are to survive as a species.