Confucius looked disconsolate and sighed.
…”I was twice driven from Lu; I had to flee from Wei;
the tree under which I taught was cut down in Song;
I was held in a state of siege between Chen and Cai.

I do not know what transgressions I had committed that brought about
the hardship in these four circumstances.”

The stranger looked perturbed and said,
“It is very difficult, Sir, to make you comprehend!
There was a man so frightened of his shadow and so abhorred
seeing his own footprints that he ran to escape them.
But the more he lifted his feet, the more numerous were
his footprints; however speedily he ran, his shadow never left
him. He thought that he was running too slowly, and ran ever
faster until his strength came to an end and he died.

He did not realize that had he rested in the shade,
his shadow would have disappeared, and had he stayed still,
his footprints would not have pursued him.

His ignorance was deplorable.”

Zhuangzi trans. by Hyun Höchsmann and Yang Guorong. Book 31 The Old Fisherman

The dialog between Confucius and the old fisherman continues. Confucius has encountered him while taking a rest in the midst of an arduous journey. One could imply from the conversation pivot point, the litany of complaints that Confucius voices to the fisherman – that he is making his way to a more safe area. Confucius point is simply: What did I do, to deserve to have to flee for my own safety? He does recount a direct attempt on his life when a tree was felled that was meant to kill or injure him.

Today Laura and I dedicated a portion of time to be present at the No Kings demonstration taking place across the country. A few million like minded Americans engaged in public protest against the high handed, cruel policies of the Trump administration, and the posse that he surrounds himself with. I realize this demonstration likely registers no effect upon the administration in power. Individuals accustomed to coercion take no account of disapproval insofar as they believe their tactic always works for them.

On our return walk through the parking lot a late-model white Ford Dualie passed in front of us. The big vehicle displayed “We the people…” in painted black script immediately under the side doors. We were near enough to hear the person behind the wheel loudly say, “Fucking idiots”! Certainly he was unhappy to be inconvenienced by our crowd of anti-Trump liberals.

How easily any of us falls into the trap of assuming that circumstances inconvenience us, or worse  threatened us directly – when we’re innocent of anything deserving such ill treatment. In short, we feel indignant. We’re pissed at life.

But this scenario can become darker. What if we have been seduced to believe that our displeasure is attributed to someone else? Convinced that “the Jews” or illegal immigrants or the libs or women, or______________ . A blank space permits a reader to produce his preferred “out” group to scapegoat.

To generalize the old fisherman’s reply to Confucius: Why are you so frightened? Why not just stop? Catch your breath. Granted life is by definition precarious. But we are not compelled to allow our own, or anyone else’s paranoia to stampede us.

The monster’s we flee are in our heads, and in so far as we are running ignorance will do us in…

I will never outrun my own ghosts!