Time’s Spell
On the watch face the big hand imperceptibly is closer to 11am. I am situated at Starbucks, later in the morning than usual. Reflecting upon the situational context of the past evening, certainly I identify the moment when I decided to consume yet one more cookie. Such a moment can be consequential if one is diabetic. Several hours later, I a diabetic, patiently responded to a spike in blood sugar, – and then I was able to safely turn in for the evening’s rest.
Did I choose to eat the extra cookie, because my reason indicated that I’d be ok? Or was my disposition a manifestation of a chain of events, trailing into my childhood past? My childhood occurred in the care of parents who remembered the Great Depression. Our household cupboard featured a wide selection of cookies. The Keebler Elf was a family member! As any parent will attest a child easily solves the logistical problem of accessing a cupboard.
Now as I view the matter, a particular genetic inheritance + circumstances evolving with a life of their own = a condition which medical science recognizes as diabetes. But back to last night, did I “decide” or was the matter in-the-cards all along? How much responsibility is mine for one cookie more? All, some, or none? I mean that additional cookie, the shortened evening of rest, and the late morning session with Starbucks coffee in hand? The thing that leads to another, or said better, the many things that evolve/devolve into a present state of things.
That something, is it an elephant-in-the-room which I am in full-out denial? Or maybe it’s as bitter-sweet as the sound of Fleetwood Mack and Silver Springs emanating from the speaker overhead.
Stevie Nick’s sings Silver Springs.
