Parenting Digression
The link between excellence in parenting and a happy childhood is obvious. There are not many excellent parents. From my observation of families, and of my own experience a majority of us greet our newly born child as if we were Adam and Eve. I am sobered to acknowledge that most of us enter upon parenting as if we happen to be the first in the history of the world, to accept responsibility for another human being, responsibility lasting roughly for twenty years. I remember and I inwardly blush at how much was lacking, at how inattentive I was– toward each of the three lives in succession, that I was by nature-bound to provide and care for. I wonder if I could have done better?
I credit the success of our three children reaching productive adulthood to my wife’s sensitivity and skilled diligence. Without question the physicality of giving birth makes a visceral point to a female — parenting is work, and more work. We fathers have no clue about what giving birth is like.
Too, our kids themselves deserve a lot of the credit. Each has become a tough-minded, compassionate adult.
Now, I hope to engage more mindfully as a grandparent, by comparison to my parenting years. With good health, and luck (fortune always plays its part) my adult children may be assured that they are not the first ever to parent a child. The work is good work, and becomes more richly rewarding as the journey develops. That I have observed as well.
Was I a good parent? My three children alone will be in a position to make that assessment after the tale has been told.
And that is the way it always is.
